[Capt.Nawara]

أعزائي الكرام
أسعد الله أيامكم
أرحب بكم في موضوعي
وأتمنى لكم رحلة موفقة بين أسطره
مع مضيف الرحلة المضحك الذي يئس من تكرار نفس الإسطوانة في كل رحلة

كل مرة انا اللي اتكلم


:iconloli:





In my own words: "I was flying from SFO to PDX on Friday, and the flight attendant reading the flight safety information had the whole plane looking at each other like 'what the heck?' (Getting PDX people to look at each other is an accomplishment.) So once we got airborne, I took out my laptop and typed up what she said so I wouldn't forget. I've left out a few parts I'm sure, but this is most of it."
******************************************


Before takeoff...
"Hello, and welcome to Alaska Flight 438 to Portland. If you're going to Portland, you're in the right place. If you're not going to Portland, you're about to have a really long evening."

"We'd like to tell you now about some important safety features of this aircraft. The most important safety feature we have aboard this plane is...The Flight Attendants. Please look at one now."

"There are 5 exits aboard this plane: 2 at the front, 2 over the wings, and one out the plane's rear end. If you're seated in one of the exit rows, please do not store your bags by your feet. That would be a really bad idea. Please take a moment and look around and find the nearest exit. Count the rows of seats between you and the exit. In the event that the need arises to find one, trust me, you'll be glad you did.

We have pretty blinking lights on the floor that will blink in the direction of the exits. White ones along the normal rows, and pretty red ones at the exit rows."

"In the event of a loss of cabin pressure these baggy things will drop down over your head. You stick it over your nose and mouth like the flight attendant is doing now. The bag won't inflate, but there's oxygen there, promise. If you are sitting next to a small child, or someone who is acting like a small child, please do us all a favor and put on your mask first. If you are traveling with two or more children, please take a moment now to decide which one is your favorite. Help that one first, and then work your way down."

"In the seat pocket in front of you is a pamphlet about the safety features of this plane. I usually use it as a fan when I'm having my own personal summer. It makes a very good fan. It also has pretty pictures. Please take it out and play with it now."

"Please take a moment now to make sure your seat belts are fastened low and tight about your waist. To fasten the belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle. To release, it's a pulley thing -- not a pushy thing like your car because you're in an airplane -- HELLOOO!!"

"There is no smoking in the cabin on this flight. There is also no smoking in the lavatories. If we see smoke coming from the lavatories, we will assume you are on fire and put you out. This is a free service we provide. There are two smoking sections on this flight, one outside each wing exit.

We do have a movie in the smoking sections tonight...hold on, let me check what it is...Oh here it is; the movie tonight is 'Gone with the Wind.' "

"In a moment we will be turning off the cabin lights, and it's going to get really dark, really fast. If you're afraid of the dark, now would be a good time to reach up and press the yellow button. The yellow button turns on your reading light. Please don't press the orange button unless you absolutely have to.
The orange button is your seat ejection button."

"We're glad to have you with us on board this flight. Thank you for choosing Alaska Air, and giving us your business and your money. If there's anything we can do to make you more comfortable, please don't hesitate to ask."

"If you all weren't strapped down you would have given me! a standing ovation, wouldn't you?"

After landing...
"Welcome to the Portland International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the captain's fault. It's not the copilot's fault. It's the asphalt."

"Please remain seated until the plane is parked at the gate. At no time in history has a passenger beaten a plane to the gate. So please don't even try. Please be careful opening the overhead bins because 'shift happens'."


بمبي لاندينق ها؟؟ أنا أعلمك...







ودمــــــــتـــــــــــــم بـــخـــير

:ANSmile15:

[أوتار ممزقة]

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة Flight Rose  

أعزائي الكرام
أسعد الله أيامكم
أرحب بكم في موضوعي
وأتمنى لكم رحلة موفقة بين أسطره
مع مضيف الرحلة المضحك الذي يئس من تكرار نفس الإسطوانة في كل رحلة

كل مرة انا اللي اتكلم

:iconloli:

In my own words: "I was flying from SFO to PDX on Friday, and the flight attendant reading the flight safety information had the whole plane looking at each other like 'what the heck?' (Getting PDX people to look at each other is an accomplishment.) So once we got airborne, I took out my laptop and typed up what she said so I wouldn't forget. I've left out a few parts I'm sure, but this is most of it."
******************************************

Before takeoff...
"Hello, and welcome to Alaska Flight 438 to Portland. If you're going to Portland, you're in the right place. If you're not going to Portland, you're about to have a really long evening."

"We'd like to tell you now about some important safety features of this aircraft. The most important safety feature we have aboard this plane is...The Flight Attendants. Please look at one now."

"There are 5 exits aboard this plane: 2 at the front, 2 over the wings, and one out the plane's rear end. If you're seated in one of the exit rows, please do not store your bags by your feet. That would be a really bad idea. Please take a moment and look around and find the nearest exit. Count the rows of seats between you and the exit. In the event that the need arises to find one, trust me, you'll be glad you did.

We have pretty blinking lights on the floor that will blink in the direction of the exits. White ones along the normal rows, and pretty red ones at the exit rows."

"In the event of a loss of cabin pressure these baggy things will drop down over your head. You stick it over your nose and mouth like the flight attendant is doing now. The bag won't inflate, but there's oxygen there, promise. If you are sitting next to a small child, or someone who is acting like a small child, please do us all a favor and put on your mask first. If you are traveling with two or more children, please take a moment now to decide which one is your favorite. Help that one first, and then work your way down."

"In the seat pocket in front of you is a pamphlet about the safety features of this plane. I usually use it as a fan when I'm having my own personal summer. It makes a very good fan. It also has pretty pictures. Please take it out and play with it now."

"Please take a moment now to make sure your seat belts are fastened low and tight about your waist. To fasten the belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle. To release, it's a pulley thing -- not a pushy thing like your car because you're in an airplane -- HELLOOO!!"

"There is no smoking in the cabin on this flight. There is also no smoking in the lavatories. If we see smoke coming from the lavatories, we will assume you are on fire and put you out. This is a free service we provide. There are two smoking sections on this flight, one outside each wing exit.

We do have a movie in the smoking sections tonight...hold on, let me check what it is...Oh here it is; the movie tonight is 'Gone with the Wind.' "

"In a moment we will be turning off the cabin lights, and it's going to get really dark, really fast. If you're afraid of the dark, now would be a good time to reach up and press the yellow button. The yellow button turns on your reading light. Please don't press the orange button unless you absolutely have to.
The orange button is your seat ejection button."

"We're glad to have you with us on board this flight. Thank you for choosing Alaska Air, and giving us your business and your money. If there's anything we can do to make you more comfortable, please don't hesitate to ask."

"If you all weren't strapped down you would have given me! a standing ovation, wouldn't you?"

After landing...
"Welcome to the Portland International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the captain's fault. It's not the copilot's fault. It's the asphalt."

"Please remain seated until the plane is parked at the gate. At no time in history has a passenger beaten a plane to the gate. So please don't even try. Please be careful opening the overhead bins because 'shift happens'."

بمبي لاندينق ها؟؟ أنا أعلمك...

ودمــــــــتـــــــــــــم بـــخـــير

:ANSmile15:

the best for that host going for working
as train host not as air plane host

hehehehehehehehe
thank you very much

[PILOT FUTUER]

"Welcome to the Portland International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the captain's fault. It's not the copilot's fault. It's the asphalt."

:hilar ious:: hilarious:

تسلم على الطرح

[Capt.Nawara]

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة عالم الطيران  

the best for that host going for working
as train host not as air plane host

hehehehehehehehe
thank you very much

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة PILOT FUTUER  

True
hehehe

He was so sick and tired repeating the whole safety instructions

hope you like it

thnx 4 passing by
:ANSmile15:

"Welcome to the Portland International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the captain's fault. It's not the copilot's fault. It's the asphalt."

:hilar ious:: hilarious:

تسلم على الطرح

الله يسلمك كابتن

It was fun during this flight

اشكر مرورك يالغالي

تحياتي
:ANSmile15:

[traneem]

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة Flight Rose  

After landing...

"Welcome to the Portland International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the captain's fault. It's not the copilot's fault. It's the asphalt."

تحفة بصراحة :)
زين يعني واضح جدا ان قصة قبل النوم للمسافرين كانت من الملل فيعني لو مستخدمين الاعلان المتعارف عليه ومخلصين في دقيقتين مو احسن :)
يعطيك العافية على مشاركتنا هالمعلقة :)

[DraKe Bell]

يا عينى علية
شكرا لك كابتن
موضوع حلو

[Captain-Ahmed]

LMAO !!!

شكرا على ال brief الحلو

[Capt.Nawara]

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة traneem  

تحفة بصراحة :)
زين يعني واضح جدا ان قصة قبل النوم للمسافرين كانت من الملل فيعني لو مستخدمين الاعلان المتعارف عليه ومخلصين في دقيقتين مو احسن :)
يعطيك العافية على مشاركتنا هالمعلقة :)

الله يعافيك
أشكرك عالتعليق
وبالعكس .. هذه الإبداعات هي لذة السفر الروتيني

أشكر مرورك
تحياتي

:ANSmile15:

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة turkish_air_liens  

يا عينى علية
شكرا لك كابتن
موضوع حلو

أهلا وسهلا فيك ياكابتن
شرفت موضوعي
تحياتي لك

:ANSmile15:

اقتباس:     المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة Captain-Ahmed  

LMAO !!!

شكرا على ال brief الحلو

يا أهلا فيك كابتن

الموضوع نور بوجودك

اشكرك ع المرور الطيب
تحياتي لك
:ANSmile15: